26 Twenty-Nineth Beginning (Nanowrimo 2007) Organizing Aunt Sheila

[Time warp to an argument.  One that would occur in the second half of the book, if the book should ever be finished.  First draft, of course.  No dialog tags and still getting a feel for the characters.]

You knew that Father was alive.  You knew that I didn’t’ know.  You knew that you were supporting a smug, lying sack of shit who was deliberately torturing her husband for not loving her.

How dare you!  You come waltzing in here and pretend that you know what has been happening.  Mother was a saint looking after Father.

Mother was a hateful, stupid cow who always hated Father and reveled in finally having him under her thumb and helpless.  She could pretend he was anything she wanted him to be without him being able to say anything about it.  Gods but she must have loved him losing the power of speech. 

Oh, words.  You have fine words.  He never did know what he was creating in you.  Puffing you up and pretending that you were important when you were nothing but and empty shell.

I hate it when you parrot Mother and do it badly.  Has she been dead long enough that you’ve forgotten most of her spleen.  Well, you’d better hope that you’ve been coward enough not to do anything provably illegal.  You’ll be clutching your bible and chewing on her liver in jail, if you have. 

You are a trumped up. . .

Oh, I’ll trump you all right.  You have nothing in your hand but a little bit of information that might be interesting to me and you know what?  I’m willing to let that go.  The family history can die with you.  You and Mother and your sluggish bile.   You have nothing on your side but possibly a little local corruption and xenophobia.

You are Satan’s tongue.  We were a happy family until you were born.  Tempting a good man with the weakness of his pride in his intellect.

Happy family.  She got herself knocked up.

Myrtle was shocked rigid.  She was gripped with fear.  This had never been said and there were no familiar arguments to put up against it.

Do the math.  Barbara was born six months after they were married.  You were born six years later.  In a world with no birth control, that means it took him that long to be willing to touch her.

You would speak of sex.

And she would not speak of sex while humping for her own purposes.

I must forgive you.  You have become unaccustomed to the company of Christians.

I know plenty of Christians and I know that chanting Jesus, Jesus, Jesus doesn’t keep anyone from fucking like bunnies.

Your words!  If Mother were alive.

If Mother were alive I’d spit in her hateful face.  But she’s not so I’ll settle for undoing some of her crime.  I’m having the tumor removed from Father’s brain.

Father had a stroke.  Myrtle’s voice was small.

That was a lie.  That was the lie that Mother told me.  She didn’t bother to tell it here, so this proves that you helped her lie to me.  Here she just told people that they didn’t have enough money to do the surgery.  She let everyone think that Father was sitting in his own drool, piss, and shit because she couldn’t part with the cash to fix him.

And you know what?  The surgery that would have been fairly simple then may kill him now.  He’s been wasting away for decades.  He may not have the strength to get through it.  How does it feel?  To murder your own Father.  For someone else’s spite.  How did it feel?  You had to snuggle up against Mother, she had emptied you out so that she was all you had.  You’d have had to go into that house knowing that he was upstairs dying.  Upstairs so that she could complain about going up and down.  Too pigheaded to convert a parlor into a sickroom because that wasn’t done.  It was a parlor.  I can just hear her saying something stupid like that.

I will pray for you.

You do that.  And pray for yourself.  Old farts don’t do well in jail.  And you’re going to be talking to a lot of earnest law enforcement personnel.  It’s going to get embarrassing.

It will not embarrass me, as I have done nothing wrong.  Not like some people who abandon their own kin to go swaning off.

How marry unwisely and get dumped.  I’m sure you enjoyed knowing that I was in the hospital and left without the wherewithal to answer the divorce.

Hospital.

Yes.  Mother knew.  Mother got the pleasure of telling me that the infection was the supernatural striking me down for not honoring her properly.  Selfish cow.  God, I hate it when her hatefulness comes out of  my mouth.  But I’m angry.

Do not refer to God as the supernatural.  It belittles Him.

Your worship belittles him, but that’s a topic for another time and a brain that’s actually working.  I’m excoriating you about Father.  You knew he had a tumor and that  Mother was using it to imprison him.  You knew it and you did nothing.

There was nothing that I could do.  I had cleaved to my own husband and had a child to care for.  You’d know nothing about that, I’m sure.

You are lucky that my knees are sore or I’d stand up and slap you.  You helped Mother help my lying ex-husband steal my daughter and you have the gall to accuse me of having no children.  You can’t even keep your indignant lies straight.  You betray yourself on all sides.

I can’t blame you for hating Father a little.  After all, he left you, and he left you with a hateful, spiteful woman.

Father never left me. 

He left when Barbara died.  When she was six.  He never said much about it, but he told me some.  He stayed away for years.

But  he came back in the end.

He came back because she played her standard card.  It didn’t turn out quite the way she hoped.

Sheila let that sit.  Maybe Myrtle could understand a little innuendo of a certain type.

What standard card.

She got herself knocked up again.  With me.  Without him.  He was states away.

So you know.  You know that you’re a bastard and no part of this family.  And yet you come back and make trouble for us.  Oh, you are a viper.

You are an ass.  Of course I’m part of this family.  He was willing to stay married to the goring cow to be sure I was his.  He checked the law and you’d better check it, too, before you start thinking that you can just brush me off. 

You knew you weren’t his.

I’m his.  I guess she picked someone that he valued to bump uglies with.  You were around her enough that you probably know who it was.  Heck, you were living with her when she did it.  I wouldn’t blame you for not wanting to think about it, though.

He killed himself.

Most men would, waking up with that.

Myrtle’s face contorted with anger.  The anger was galling and caused her to pace around the room.

You’ll be talking with the Feds over helping John kidnap Elizabeth and pretend to be Father to sell off his property.  I’ll leave that mostly in their hands.  Unless Father dies, of course.  I may have some time to devote to checking in on the case, if I’m left at loose ends.

May have the time.  You talk about persecuting me if you have the time.  Do you even hear the evil in your voice.

You’d know evil.  I’ll leave it to you.  I’ll leave Elizabeth to John, too.  She’s grown up twisted and gutted.  Being in the same room with her disgusts me.  He can have what’s left. 

What’s left?  Barbara is a fine woman.

You don’t like her any more than you like me.  From what I hear you don’t like anybody.  You visit your daughter, but she’s difficult to take, except in small doses. 

Sometimes the Lord gives us burdens.

True.  And sometimes it’s jackasses piling on your back.  I will give you that the jackasses don’t have quite the ammunition that the Lord does.  Although some of them do try to hurt you to biblical proportions.

And who has hurt you more than you’ve hurt yourself?

You for one.  And to no purpose other than humoring an idiot.  I suppose I never had the fear of Mother put into me the way you did while Father was gone and there was no one to protect you from her whims and crotchets.  It must have been frightening for a child.  I’ve always pitied you for that. 

Pitied me?  Pitied me because Mother loved me?

Mother never had enough perspective to love anyone.

I pity you if you think that.  To think that a person needs perspective (the word was spat out in a hiss), an intellectual distance to love.

They need enough wit to be able to tell that there’s another person there.  You were never there for her.  No one was.  There was just her.  Her and her daughter.  Her and her husband.  She had no clue who Myrtle was and no care for what Myrtle wanted.  She was the center of the universe and if she was happy, all was well in the kingdom.  It didn’t matter who else was bleeding or in pain.  They were only complaining about selfish things.  People were dolls to her.

And don’t think that I didn’t notice that John enjoyed being able to call Elizabeth Barbie, like she was a doll.  That’s just sick.

He doted on her the way Father doted on you.  And he ruined her just like Father ruined you.

And you stood by and let it happen.  You enjoy watching evil, don’t you?

There is no enjoying evil, there is just no getting away from it.

Trapped at home with Mother.  Yes, I can see how you’d come to see that.  I’ll let the Feds find out if you were paid off.  If you were, your butt will be warming a jail bunk.

Myrtle hugged her bible.

I take it that’s a yes.  I take it that the theft has already been sanitized with holiness. 

I have a daughter.  You wouldn’t . . .

You’re lucky you stopped yourself.  There’s an ugly shepardess within reach that I’ll be throwing if you ever sully your lips with that particular lie again.  And there are ways to get money besides back-stabbing relatives.  I know.  I was left penniless and sick. 

John was a good man.

John was a leach.  And a liar.  He ran from me and if they let him out on bail, he’ll run again.

He can’t run.  He has someone he loves, now.

Maybe.  It’s been years since I’ve laid eyes on him.  I remember his love as being a bit thin, in the old days.  His sense of entitlement was thick, and his spite was thicker.  His love wouldn’t warm a butterfly. 

Well, I’ve said everything I wanted to say.  You are a coward and a criminal.  I pity you but I’m tired of pussyfooting around you out of pity.  I’m going to take care of Father.  And then I’m going to have surgery myself.  There will be lawyers and lawsuits and I’ll be taking back everything that John took from Father.  You can have Mother’s house.  He never liked it. 

I forgive you.

Liar.  You hate me.  I got away.  At least you think I did.

I don’t expect you to forgive me or to understand.

Good.  I’ll be too busy for either for the foreseeable future. 

You lack the love of God.

But I do love my Father.  And I hate his enemies.  I’m not used to hating.  Tell me, does it get easier with time?

I’ll be going.

[Not much left in the Nanowrimo doc for this Beginning.  And I haven't checked the remainder.  If it's just filler, I won't bother posting it.]

25 Twenty-Nineth Beginning (Nanowrimo 2007) Organizing Aunt Sheila

[This is the last of the conversation between Barbara and her Aunt Sheila.  That does not mean that the conversation came to a conclusion, only that the writing for Nanowrimo shifted to another topic - one with less filler and a smidge of plot.  It would probably be a mistake to expect chronological order, though. 

Below, Barbara is still working through the collection of her aunt's notes.]

Let me see.

Met E as planned – the oven got up to 450 in 20 minutes, so we should have no problem cooking the turkeys.  E will be coming and bringing the keys and heraldry stuff.  She may go home and rest if she gets tired, . . . skipping stuff.

No garbage down the disposal – it will back up, not only in the sink, but through the floor drain in the smaller kitchen – that would be a real mess – have the herald announce that the food from all dishes must be scraped into the trash before they are washed – we might want to post a sign, too

Skipping more stuff.

We can use the coffee urns if we want, - - - They’re letting us use the spices in the pantry if we want. - - - trash to go out at the end  - - - may want to bring a dolly for moving the trash cans - - -The center will be open for senior drop-in from 10 – 2 – blah, blah, blah.

Ah, that’s an old note about getting ready for a medieval Yule Feast.  It was awhile ago.  It wasn’t a strict recreation.  We provided turkey and ham and everyone brought pot luck.

The turkey was not period.

Period?

It was anachronistic to the period being recreated. 

Which period was that?

The Middle Ages.  That covers quite a few centuries,  so the event was anachronistic in itself because we didn’t narrow the time zone to, say 14th century Burgundy.

I thought burgundy was a drink.

It was also an area in France.  Still is.

There were no turkeys in the Middle Ages?

Not in the European Middle Ages.  Turkeys were imported to Europe from the Americas.  They arrived after Columbus.

Ah. European Middle Ages.  DWG syndrome.

Dead White Guy?

Yup.

I think I’m going to take another nap.

You need to see a doctor about getting your energy up.

Or I need to get more done so I don’t feel as much weighing down on me.

Did you remember to take your pills this morning?

Yes Mother.

Remember to pop a Tylenol if your head is feeling squinty because of all the computer work you’ve been doing.

You know, that might profit me.  I wouldn’t have though to check to see how my head was feeling.  But you’re right and that might be draining energy.  To the Tylenol.

Should I set a timer?

No, it still feels like I’m catching up.

Want me to start dinner if you sleep late?

Oh, don’t let me sleep past one.  But you can cook any time you like.

Well, you may not like it.  I haven’t had much practice.

Start with the Mac and Cheese – you can’t miss if you follow the instructions.

When all else fails. . .

24 Twenty-Nineth Beginning (Nanowrimo 2007) Organizing Aunt Sheila

[Barbara, her Aunt Sheila, and an online friend are participating in Nanowrimo (yes, I know how recursive that is) and are IMing each other as they do a sprint write near the end of the month.]

1BarbaraJW665:  Alright folks.  I’m setting the timer.  We write for one hour.  At the end of the hour we log our word count.  It doesn’t matter what we write.  We don’t have to save it at the end.

4AuntSheila1953:  Sadly, I think I’ll be saving them.

ZoomZoomZZZ: That’s OK.  Oh, did you hear?  Rose is returning for the Fourth series for three episodes!!! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. BBC confirmed it. No rumour. :D

4AuntSheila1953: cool

ZoomZoomZZZ: O_O oh, hadn't expected you to respond.

4AuntSheila1953: me neither

ZoomZoomZZZ: And 'cool' is such a poor way to celebrate such great news.

4AuntSheila1953: but it's my standard

4AuntSheila1953: I say it so often

ZoomZoomZZZ: I noticed...

4AuntSheila1953: and I'm not sure I want to go backward

ZoomZoomZZZ: You say it so often, it fails to sound sincere.

=)

4AuntSheila1953: I didn't like it when they resurrected Jean Grey

ZoomZoomZZZ: o.o;

4AuntSheila1953: how can it not be sincere when it's typical

1BarbaraJW665:  You know that the word count on the IM doesn’t count, right?

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, Mother.  I’m writing on my desktop, too.

ZoomZoomZZZ: Rose beats Jean any day.

4AuntSheila1953: ah, you obviously never read the original series

Phoenix rocked

ZoomZoomZZZ: What, you expect people to believe you when you have the same response each time...makes it seem automatic.

And no I didn't, but Rose still rules hands down. Gets ready for a debate.]

4AuntSheila1953: a grunt of phlegmatic approval

ZoomZoomZZZ: Dang it, beating me with a word I don't know. =P

I'll forgive you this time.

4AuntSheila1953: ah, so you don't know if I've misspelled it

cool

In honor of the moment, I will write about Medieval humors. 

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

So uh...

bubblegum.

</random>

4AuntSheila1953:  Although they didn’t start as Medieval humors.  They started as Ancient Greek humors.  Then the Arabs wrote about them.

I miss bubblegum

I think the bazooka is still chewy

regular chewing gum has softened to the point that it may as well not be there

ZoomZoomZZZ: All right.

4AuntSheila1953: bah - and you kids should get off of my lawn

ZoomZoomZZZ: Rose is returning, Rose is returning~

what...lawn..who..kids?

4AuntSheila1953: I hope they don't mess it up

typical old geezer statement

ZoomZoomZZZ: O_O This is Doctor Who we speak of - No folly hath I yet to see.

4AuntSheila1953: it's something that people say to imply that they're getting old and set in their ways

ZoomZoomZZZ: Ah.

1BarbaraJW665:  I knew that.  Get off of my lawn.  Get writing.  I don’t want to beat you both again.  It’s embarrassing.

4AuntSheila1953: Jean Grey was with the original X-Men

Waaaaaay back

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, yes she was.

4AuntSheila1953: Her first death was very moving

And I’ve got the humors and the elements of which they are comprised written out 255 words.  Next I’m segueing into the Medieval Target Diet.  I’ve always wanted to write an essay about that.

ZoomZoomZZZ: Ah, yeah....so you're saying she should have stayed dead?

4AuntSheila1953: resetting things just weakened the whole thing

YES!!

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

4AuntSheila1953: DEAD, DEAD, DEAD

ZoomZoomZZZ: Well, Rose isn't "Dead", she's "Gone". So, they shouldn't mess it up...

4AuntSheila1953: it was a lovely sacrifice

1BarbaraJW665:  Is the MTDiet in the database.

4AuntSheila1953:  I don’t think so.  It wasn’t something that I thought I would forget about.

I’ve got a spreadsheet on the foods and their humors (and antidotes).  It’s on floppy somewhere. 

1BarbaraJW665:  I’ll make a note of that.  I’ll do the archaeology later.

I’m doing a reverse diary.  423 words.  I zoom by you.

ZoomZoomZZZ: Doctor Who rules, I'm not worried how well it will turn out...

And I’m nearly to 600 words, so hah!

4AuntSheila1953: yes, but they've been mooning over not being able to be together

ZoomZoomZZZ: Well, yeah...and this will be a "Happy" moment.

4AuntSheila1953: are they going to have to moon over each other now that she's back

?

ZoomZoomZZZ: Er, I don't know...

4AuntSheila1953: Is she going to have to die to part them?

ZoomZoomZZZ: You're ruining my excitement.

4AuntSheila1953: DEAD, DEAD, DEAD

And the two perfect foods that can be used to temper all other foods into alignment with the human body’s humors are . . . wait for it. . . sugar and pork fat.

Are either of you old enough to remember Covert Bailey’s Target Diet?

ZoomZoomZZZ: Maybe he gets stuck in a parallel universe again.

No on the Covert. 

1BarbaraJW665:  What kind of parent names their child Covert?

4AuntSheila1953: mebbe

ZoomZoomZZZ: and before they can be together again, he gets knocked back into his.

4AuntSheila1953: If they do it right, it will be good

ZoomZoomZZZ: >:) They will do it right. Mwuahahahaha.

4AuntSheila1953: If they're doing it as fan service, they might mess it up

ZoomZoomZZZ: I don't think so...

o.o;  I’m going to steal the name Covert.  With a name like that, he has to be an assassin.

4AuntSheila1953: It will depend on the script

If they had a good script idea, that's all well and good

If they just wanted her back and fudged a script to do it . . .

. . . I'll let you watch it first

oh, and are you writing about the school for assassins again?

ZoomZoomZZZ: She's only in it for three episodes.

So...that's not really getting her back. ^^

And, yeah.  The happy-go-lucky school.

4AuntSheila1953: Martha left, right?

http://www.unshelved.com/images/store/tee-ww4b-mens-large.gif

ZoomZoomZZZ: Though, theoretically it could mean "Three episodes of the fourth series, and all episodes of the fifth series." because they only said she would be in the fourth series, but didn't elaborate if she might leave after that...

Martha will return halfway through the fourth series...

4AuntSheila1953: So who starts it out?

Other than the Titanic?

ZoomZoomZZZ: Donna Noble

4AuntSheila1953: The comic?

ZoomZoomZZZ: They will have a guest companion for the Titanic special.

Kylie Monogue...or however you spell her name.

4AuntSheila1953: Douglas Adams wrote a computer game called The Starship Titanic

I think Kylie is the comic

the mouthy one

ZoomZoomZZZ: o.o;

1BarbaraJW665:  do not buy that shirt.  especially do not buy that shirt and expect me to wear it. 

4AuntSheila1953: Terry Jones took the computer game and wrote the novel

ZoomZoomZZZ: You're confusing me, so I will resort now to smiling and nodding. nod, nod, smile, smile.

4AuntSheila1953: Eric's advice

Also Dave's

not buying shirt – got it

ZoomZoomZZZ: Wahoo...

4AuntSheila1953: about the diary – are you starting with today and going backward?

1BarbaraJW665:  No.  I’m popping around randomly.  BTW who was it that you sent to pick me up from the airport.

ZoomZoomZZZ: That's always good...

Er, go on?

Or are you saying smiling and nodding is their advice, in which case you weren't very clear.

smiles and nods

4AuntSheila1953: It's what they tell people to do whenever they think I've said something that doesn't make sense – also known as S&N

And it was Bear Bear that picked you up from the airport.

ZoomZoomZZZ: Ah.

4AuntSheila1953: I tell them they need to learn to keep up

and they smile and nod

1BarbaraJW665:  I haven’t met him since then right?

ZoomZoomZZZ: The question being, do you confuse people on purpose?

4AuntSheila1953: no

not usually

ZoomZoomZZZ: So you aren't laughing maniacally in your head?

4AuntSheila1953: no

1BarbaraJW665: nearly 777 words

ZoomZoomZZZ: I figured as much. (and I think I’m still ahead on the words, but I’m not going to stop and count)

So, what would you say is the cause of your confusion?

4AuntSheila1953: I'm not the one who gets confused

ZoomZoomZZZ: Aha! So you blame the confused people! I rest my case...

lol jk

4AuntSheila1953: Although I may not have made myself clear – sometimes I’ve gone over things in my head enough that they’ve become familiar to me – and then I leave out necessary bits of intermediary explanation.  Only passing 500.  I’m editing myself too much for a sprint.

ZoomZoomZZZ: ^_~ Tis fine.

Hmm...so...explain the reasons for your latage uppage?

4AuntSheila1953: uppage?

ZoomZoomZZZ: latage uppage = late up.

For being up late, basically.

4AuntSheila1953: haven't written today

feeling guilty

want to check it off my list before I head for bed

ZoomZoomZZZ: Ah.

Olivian Spark.

I had a dream about a boy named Olivian Spark, a boy who had chefs for parents...a boy who was called Olive by them.

A boy, who was often outcasted for the very name his parents so lovingly gave him.

Poor boy.

He hid in the Headmaster's bedroom, don't ask me why.

I do know there was a crime...

now was he hiding for that very reason? Did he commit it...I did not ask. I did ask his name...it was Olivian Spark.

smiles and nods I feel quite pleased with my observation. This boy who oft pretended he was a girl, to avoid the laughter when his parents called him Olive.

It was darkly humorous though, that it was quite obvious he was a boy, and so he was made fun of doubly.

Any inspiring dreams on your end, or are you simply not there? poke, poke.

4AuntSheila1953: hmmm

sorry

thinking about the irony

of sugar and pork fat being perfect foods

so perfect that they temper other foods into safety

ZoomZoomZZZ: Um...what?

4AuntSheila1953: that's why I didn't see the message right away

ZoomZoomZZZ: Please elaborate.

4AuntSheila1953: Humors and elements – or, rather, qualities:  Melancholic (black bile - cold and dry), Sanguine (blood – warm and moist), Choleric (yellow bile - warm and dry), and Phlegmatic (phlegm - cold and moist)

ZoomZoomZZZ: I got it now.^^

I don’t know what to do with it, but I’ve got it

and this is why phlegmatic slipped into your comments earlier

4AuntSheila1953: yes – phlegm, by the way, is mucus aka snot that hasn’t been expelled from the body yet.

ZoomZoomZZZ: ew

1BarbaraJW665: so it’s another locational noun.  like meteor, meteorite, meteroid.

4AuntSheila1953: oooo Alton Brown – and I’ll have to think about the locational thing,  Look it up.

did you check out the t-shirt, Z?

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, yes I did. Very cute...did you check out my messages?

4AuntSheila1953: about the dream of a new character?

I think it's cool that you're getting messages from beyond

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol whut?

4AuntSheila1953: maybe I missed something

didn't you say you were dreaming of olives?

(I kid)

ZoomZoomZZZ: I didn't claim to be a medium?

I was dreaming of a boy named Olivian Spark, who was often called Olive...I got his full name as I woke up, quite oddly...but he was called in the dream Olive.

1BarbaraJW665: don’t look it up now – 1,221 words

4AuntSheila1953: not afterlife beyond

ZoomZoomZZZ: What, beyond the vegetable life? XD

4AuntSheila1953: land of dreaming beyond

ZoomZoomZZZ: OH

lol

4AuntSheila1953: Have I ever inflicted The Sandman on you?

ZoomZoomZZZ: No, you haven't...you keep insisting you would, but you never do.

4AuntSheila1953: It was a comic series by Neil Gaiman

ZoomZoomZZZ: No.

Stop there please.

1553 words

4AuntSheila1953: it is THE best comic series that was ever written

ZoomZoomZZZ: You have explained this all ready. ^^

4AuntSheila1953: ever

ever

1BarbaraJW665: you may have more words, but I be I have more capital letters

ZoomZoomZZZ: You told me it was the best comic series you've ever read, by Neil Gaiman, and how it is pronounced GAY-MAN not Guy-min.

4AuntSheila1953: The first story arc is kinda gory - but it sets things up

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, you said that too.

And you loved the whole "Dream" aspect or something...

Dream was a person/being I think you said.

Though Chris Baty pronounced it Guy-min too, so I am suspicious.

and capitals are overrated

we are the IM generation

Sent at 12:38 AM on Friday

4AuntSheila1953: When Neil pronounces it, he says Gay-mun

ZoomZoomZZZ: How many times have you heard Neil speak his name?

4AuntSheila1953: He's on tape

reading his own stuff

ZoomZoomZZZ: And for the record, you know Neil is not a very serious person.

4AuntSheila1953: ??

ZoomZoomZZZ: I mean, he could have been joking. Or his accent could have thrown the pronunciation off...

But I suppose the owner of the name is the most reliable source.

4AuntSheila1953:??

ZoomZoomZZZ: Did I say something odd?

Spark isn't a surname. Sparks is...Olivian Sparks...sound any better or worse?

Or should I not argue with this character on it's name?

4AuntSheila1953: No matter how flip he may be, I think he knows how to pronounce his own name

Spark or

Sparks would work

1BarbaraJW665:  the first night I was here – did you get up in the middle of the night and clean?

ZoomZoomZZZ: o_o was that sarcasm on your part, or am I over-analyzing?

4AuntSheila1953: which part?

and, no – no late-night cleaning

I wish.

I was way to tired, then.

Z - No matter how flip he may be, I think he knows how to pronounce his own name

ZoomZoomZZZ: Oh, well it looked like it. ^^

but since it isn't I won't put another thought into it.

4AuntSheila1953: k

starting to fall asleep

ZoomZoomZZZ: You know, I should right my own book on "Things to say to make people make an excuse to leave."

Which is supposed to be a joke, but I think I failed in execution.

4AuntSheila1953: that might sell

ZoomZoomZZZ: I say something that may seem odd or uncomforting, and suddenly people have to go...is that coincidence?

4AuntSheila1953: I'm not sure

I'm sleepy enough that it probably wasn't

or was

B – how much time left on the timer

ZoomZoomZZZ: Hmm.

4AuntSheila1953: I’m going to put on Pushing Daisies in the background

ZoomZoomZZZ: Well, I didn't mean anything bad by asking if you were being sarcastic...sarcasm is good. You know? =D

1BarbaraJW665: 27 minutes to go in Writers Stadium

4AuntSheila1953: PD it's making me want to make pies – Iron Chef comments aren’t dispelling the urge

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, I get the same urge...

1BarbaraJW665:  sorry

4AuntSheila1953: and I do sarcasm from time to time

Don’t apologize for saying something that makes me want to cook.  Any stimulus to action is good, even food related ones. 

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes.

4AuntSheila1953: hard to tell sarcasm online sometimes -  with no vocal inflection or emoticon

ZoomZoomZZZ: Did you know, the majority of times I am sarcastic someone finds me serious and answers me as such, and the moment I am serious people answer as if I was joking?

4AuntSheila1953: hmmmm

ZoomZoomZZZ: e

Ever happen to you?

4AuntSheila1953: and how does that make you feel (fake shrink accent)

and yes, it happens to me

ZoomZoomZZZ: Now, I wonder 'is being sarcastic under the radar a good thing, as I don't get in trouble with anyone, or a bad thing because then people think I am stupid for saying what I said?'

It makes me feel frustrated. (Fake crazy accent.)

1BarbaraJW665: over 2000

and I need to pick a new day

4AuntSheila1953: also, I'm often taking David seriously and then he says he was being sarcastic

ZoomZoomZZZ: my mom asks, "How are you doing with your book?" As in how many words?

4AuntSheila1953: the nanowrimo ‘book’?  over 20,000

and the characters keep starting new conversations in my head

ZoomZoomZZZ: "Cool."

4AuntSheila1953: but I'm not getting them down on paper

ZoomZoomZZZ: Hah

I am so used to character's popping up at random intervals...usually in convenient moments...or story ideas, little tidbits of inspiration...how this or that plotline can work...so I finally got that small composition notebook I've shown you.

*in inconvenient

I find, as long as I take the voices in my head as bits of inspiration, instead of all the insane things I could take them as, that I am not crazy.

4AuntSheila1953: maybe tomorrow – I’m mean maybe tomorrow, I’ll work on the nano. 

Barbara, have you written an entry for the first day we went shopping?

ZoomZoomZZZ: And so we're clear, that was sarcasm...just not "rude" sarcasm.

4AuntSheila1953: cool

ZoomZoomZZZ: I watched the P.D. episode a couple hours prior.

4AuntSheila1953: David thinks that there's not supposed to be any change in voice for sarcasm

I contend that the voice tags the statement as sarcastic

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yep.

And unfortunately I have such an unreliable voice I don't know half the time what it sounds like.

I am constantly told different opinions on it...it's very inconvenient.

It conveys things I am not feeling. Grr. =P

4AuntSheila1953: to my mind there is no such thing as situationally obvious sarcasm

1BarbaraJW665:  the day we bought the computers?  and met Vernon?  and Grumpy Gus talked me through the network linkages?

ZoomZoomZZZ: haha. Sure.

and I’d better concentrate on writing for a bit – she’s catching up

4AuntSheila1953: David contends that there is

ZoomZoomZZZ: I think there is.

Go David.

lol

4AuntSheila1953: and that if I miss it, that's my bad

ZoomZoomZZZ: yes, yes...

4AuntSheila1953: no - if you do sarcasm without the vocal tag - that's lying

sort of

ZoomZoomZZZ: "I like throwing things. Yesterday I threw the world into chaos, and just last week I threw time out the window."

Er, "Lying". Since when does the debate on sarcasm have to discuss such a serious topic as lying...then people's feelings get hurt, and I always feel bad seeing someone hurt...='(

4AuntSheila1953: lying may be overstating it

ZoomZoomZZZ: ^^

Good, I can return to my blissfully happiness and my deniability of pending doom.

*blissful

4AuntSheila1953: chuckle

And, Barbara, I was thinking of a day or so after that when we went out buying clothes and shoes.

ZoomZoomZZZ: ^^

I'm writing that one down.

4AuntSheila1953: I'll wait – oh, no, I won’t.  I’ll write on my essay, since you children are pushing ahead so far.  “cutting things into bite sized bits (aka hacking to gobbets) or grinding things in a mortar allow the tempering agents to marry more completely with the food, transforming it more completely into something safer to eat.”

ZoomZoomZZZ: This is why I like the composition notebook.

IDEA - write - IDEA - write.

not IDEA - where's my pen? - IDEA - I think the dog ate your paper...

you know?

4AuntSheila1953: cool

there's a candy store opening across the street from the Pie Hole

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, it was a great episode.

P.D. is ze bomb.

I was hoping for some more singing, but all in due time.

4AuntSheila1953: cool that you saw it

ZoomZoomZZZ: I told you above that I had saw it a couple hours prior to this conversation.

*seen

4AuntSheila1953: I believe you

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

going to do an exercise.  I’m walking into a cafe' full of character's I thought up and see what happens.

(On WrimoRadio a woman suggested doing this.)

4AuntSheila1953: cool

sounds like a great exercise

ZoomZoomZZZ: yep

It also counts as word count. :P

Well, I'll be here if you wish to speak with me. Enjoy the show...

Sent at 1:10 AM on Friday

4AuntSheila1953: they're fighting

well, the pie man isn't

I wouldn’t have thought of folding peripheral writing into the nano book

I’m not sure that I feel that’s legal

ZoomZoomZZZ: yeah, I love that part...

I love all the parts...I love Pushing Daisies...

4AuntSheila1953: a little more than half way through

ZoomZoomZZZ: Almost halfway through...

that should be 23...25...minutes in.

4AuntSheila1953: Olive and Chuck are breaking in

ZoomZoomZZZ: Oh, that's 27 minutes in, excuse my Klatchian.

lol

4AuntSheila1953: rats (and nice use of Pratchett)

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, quite literally.

Charlotte and Olive rule~

I half suspect the name Olivian came from Olive Snook.

4AuntSheila1953: a pink head poked up

I would believe it

1BarbaraJW665: 15 minutes to go – are you sure you want me to write about that – it was sort of embarrassing

ZoomZoomZZZ: Olivian Spark > Olive Snook.

However, they are too different characters. I can tell that.

Right, go back to your show.

*two

4AuntSheila1953: they're so cute

Oh, almost time to start plating

I can remember a time in my life when I had never heard the word plating. 

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, yes they are.

4AuntSheila1953: oh, he's going to find the body in the pink

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, yes he is.

Charlotte and Ned = Cute Romance.

4AuntSheila1953: touch

ZoomZoomZZZ: A relief from all that relationship drama in other T.V. shows.

4AuntSheila1953: yeah

you killed my brother

and, Barbara, you don’t have to, but someone said something about writing being easy – you just sit down at a typewriter and open a vein.  You have to be able to write about the embarrassing.  Not that you have to right now.

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol yes

Bad Ned, Bad, bad.

1BarbaraJW665: speaking of bad – is someone watching TV AND IMing when she’s supposed to be doing a writing exercise?

Naughty, naughty

May have to give you detention

4AuntSheila1953: they're visiting in jail

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, an equally hilarious scene.

Er, um...how to say this...

4AuntSheila1953: now the morgue

ZoomZoomZZZ: Mind...er...watching your show...and...uh...letting me get to my writing?

4AuntSheila1953: I like Emerson Cob – and it isn’t TV if you watch it on the computer, from the abc website. 

ZoomZoomZZZ: And how did the scenes progress so fast?

4AuntSheila1953: Time flies when you’re having fun – and no commercials to speak of.

ZoomZoomZZZ: it is Cod.

4AuntSheila1953: write, author, write

ZoomZoomZZZ: thank, AuntSheila, you.

lol

1BarbaraJW665:  10 mins

Sent at 1:20 AM on Friday

ZoomZoomZZZ: Man, Olivian is confusing.

He keeps changing the reasons for things over and over. xD

4AuntSheila1953: not a straightforward wort?

ZoomZoomZZZ: yes

4AuntSheila1953: sort

ZoomZoomZZZ: He is missing his left eye.

He isn't too consistent on how he lost it, or if he lost it.

4AuntSheila1953: ah - an unreliable narrator

or character

ZoomZoomZZZ: Now I am to the point where he is claiming to be a Principle. He has to feed on inspiration, because he can't consume human food.

4AuntSheila1953: I love the main character of Snow Crash

his name is Hiro Protagonist

sounds like a Breatharian – I haven’t heard about them for a long time

ZoomZoomZZZ: He's the reason artist blocks and procrastination happen...and why inspiration goes away.

4AuntSheila1953: he lies - he should be stripped an flogged

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol?

4AuntSheila1953: or tickled

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

4AuntSheila1953: Hiro = Hero = Protagonist

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yes, I get it.

4AuntSheila1953: as Agonists go, he is Pro rather than Anti

ZoomZoomZZZ: Olivian says. "I've been living for centuries. Kind of boring really after the Big Bang." I laughed at this thought.

4AuntSheila1953: yeah, I guess everything else would be anticlimax after such a big thing

never considered that

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

Maybe the End of the Universe might brighten things up a bit XD XD XD

4AuntSheila1953: maybe if there's enough mass to cause it to re-condense into another bang

but it there's not enough mass, it will continue expanding as the stars slowly wink out and everything becomes cool and slow

ZoomZoomZZZ: mhmm.

4AuntSheila1953: sometimes known as The Heat Death of the Universe

or

The Final Triumph of Entropy

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

don't ask me why I'm laughing, just sounds funny.

1BarbaraJW665: 5 min

4AuntSheila1953: it's late

past a certain hour everything is funny

ZoomZoomZZZ: So true.

4AuntSheila1953: especially things in Capital letters

ZoomZoomZZZ: So true I don't see the point in pointing it out. =P

lol

4AuntSheila1953: the cactus is drunk and calling for a cab

no capitals

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

4AuntSheila1953: http://www.daniellecorsetto.com/gws.html

ZoomZoomZZZ: snuckle

4AuntSheila1953: just to show that I wasn't making that up

1BarbaraJW665: TIME – count up

Sent at 2:03 AM on Friday

ZoomZoomZZZ: is it possible to be developed with an underdeveloped eye that has to be removed, or no eye at all?

*born

developed = born.

4AuntSheila1953: I don't see why it would have to be removed

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol, 'don't see'.

4AuntSheila1953: unless it was open and the wet parts were dripping out

ZoomZoomZZZ: He doesn't either lol

4AuntSheila1953: no pun in 10 did

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

1BarbaraJW665: 3593 – I was rambling at the end

4AuntSheila1953: but I imagine there are a lot of eye-related congenital mishaps

you haven't heard that joke before

ZoomZoomZZZ: All I know is Olive doesn't have a left eye, and I am trying to think up a non-sad reason.

4AuntSheila1953: The eye fairy took it?

898 – but they’re QUALITY words

ZoomZoomZZZ: I don't want him moping over it, so I even gave him very supporting family members.

4AuntSheila1953: Guy entered a pun contest, really wanting to win

ZoomZoomZZZ: Eye Fairy....ooo...

1BarbaraJW665: Oh, Quality!  Along with TV shows and webcomics.  I see the quality. (sarcastic smilie)

4AuntSheila1953: so he sent in ten entries, assuming that with so many entries, at least one pun would win

unfortunately, no pun in 10 did

Fairy could have left him a gold coin under his pillow

or his first knife

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

I think.

Possiblh.

*possibly.

that.

3114

you may have beaten me this time, but next time I’ll get you, my little missy!

4AuntSheila1953: or a grenade

hopefully not when he was so young that he'd pull the pin accidentally

or try to feed it to his pony

looking at what I just typed

I think I need to go to bed

ZoomZoomZZZ: There are not enough eyes in the world, and sometimes an Eye Fairy is sent in to collect an eye from a person who doesn't really need it, to give it to a person who is currently eyeless. In exchange, they get a nice little magical present. His present, was a black hole for an eye (no pun intended) and a job as inspiration collector.

Possibly.

1BarbaraJW665:  there are not enough rolleyes in the world. 

4AuntSheila1953: cewl

ZoomZoomZZZ: Black hole, meaning...he can gravitate inspiration towards it, and suck it up. Yum.

Inspiration Collector.

4AuntSheila1953: I can accurately say

that idea sucks

without being derogatory

ZoomZoomZZZ: xD

So you don't mean, it's a bad idea...you mean it sucks things up...?

No? yes?

4AuntSheila1953: no - it sucks in the inspiration

gravitationally

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

4AuntSheila1953: schwooooooooooo

(that's supposed to be the sound of sucking)

ZoomZoomZZZ: Um, I got it.

Go to bed.

4AuntSheila1953: If I were being zen, I'd ask what was the sound of one lip sucking

ZoomZoomZZZ: o_O

4AuntSheila1953: it's a good thing that you can't see me laughing over that

ZoomZoomZZZ: Wow...that sounds...um...odd.

4AuntSheila1953: you've heard the koan about the sound of one hand clapping, right

?

ZoomZoomZZZ: I think you told me it...?

possibly?

looks around for a way out.

Sent at 2:17 AM on Friday

ZoomZoomZZZ: I inadvertently made Olivian friends with the Tooth Fairy.

I joked about it, and he liked the idea...

Though I think it might be a "Tooth Collector".

"Tooth Collector." "Coin Fairy." Different departments...

4AuntSheila1953: they could go out in pairs

and argue

ZoomZoomZZZ: Yep.

His friend is a Tooth Collector.

Maybe he'll also be friends with a Coin Fairy.

I don't know.

He doesn't like Eye Fairies, or Eye Collectors.

or maybe the system of eye snatching is different.

I don't know. I didn't ask.

4AuntSheila1953: dang - reruns of Let's Make a Deal are on

talk about nostalgia

I'm waiting for the goat

(and btw, not writing at the moment)

ZoomZoomZZZ: lol

4AuntSheila1953: instamatic cameras and S&H green stamps

ZoomZoomZZZ: <-- never seen it.

4AuntSheila1953: very seventies

ZoomZoomZZZ: Ah.

4AuntSheila1953: people dressed up on odd costumes

ZoomZoomZZZ: *in

though, that did make me laugh...

4AuntSheila1953: then they had to guess whether to take the instamatic camera or what's behind the big box

ah, now it's what's behind the curtain

and it's coffee plus what's behind the poster

ZoomZoomZZZ: o.o;

4AuntSheila1953: what was behind the poster was balloons

ZoomZoomZZZ: o.o;;;;;;;

4AuntSheila1953: and there was $1500 in the camera box

which was worth more in the seventies

ZoomZoomZZZ: it's still alot to me. :P

4AuntSheila1953: Good Eats is doing dumplings

ZoomZoomZZZ: YUMMY

4AuntSheila1953: looks like dessert dumplings

in something called a grunt

I don't think I'd want to eat something called a grunt

ZoomZoomZZZ: Hrm.

Sent at 2:30 AM on Friday

ZoomZoomZZZ: what eye colour do you think goes best with gray hair? (Random question)

4AuntSheila1953: feeling the blue at the moment

goes well with grey

ZoomZoomZZZ: thought so.

Sent at 2:37 AM on Friday

ZoomZoomZZZ: Normal Number.

Hmm...not that cool. Kind of funny...sort of...

Trying to think up a name for Spark's friend, the Tooth Collector.

"Number" I like that word. Hmm...maybe "Number One." lol.

4AuntSheila1953: hmm

ZoomZoomZZZ: just being random.

So far, I'm calling him "Tom" until he tells me his name.

4AuntSheila1953: that should work

bed now

night

ZoomZoomZZZ: nighty night

4AuntSheila1953: zzzz

ZoomZoomZZZ: zzzzzzz

I'm naming him Daniel! :D

Sent at 2:57 AM on Friday

ZoomZoomZZZ: It was readily apparent what made this night different from any other. In fact, apparent was the exact word to describe a sort of fairy thing, and apparently going somewhere were the exact words to describe the fairy’s actions. It was not readily apparent however as to where the apparent fairy was going. Apparently it did not wish to reveal its destination, as it blinked in and out of what could be called existence, towards a cluster of what could be called red roofed residential houses.

^-- when you wake up, can you tell me if I got the 'were' and 'was' right?

I am trying out a new style of writing, and trying to make it sort of like the narrator on pushing daisies...

Sent at 5:03 AM on Friday